The Things We Leave Behind

Last week my husband's grandmother passed away. She was 93 years old, and suffering from alzheimer's. For what seems like many long months, she did not recognize any family members, including her own son.


This weekend some time was spent going through a portion of her belongings, the things she left behind. My father-in-law pulled out two drawers from a chest and asked us to look through them and see if there was anything we would like to have. I wish I could show you actual pictures of the items, but here is a partial list:


A card signed by President Ronald Reagan, on the occasion of her 50th wedding anniversary.


Some old ration books from WWII.


Several Native American dolls and books, reflecting her Choctaw Indian heritage.


Many old spools of thread and needle books.


Postcards and brochures from places around the world that she and her husband had traveled to.


Various pieces of costume jewelry.


A pair of Mickey and Minnie dolls, a reminder of years spent living in southern California and many trips to Disneyland.


Among the other items, three stood out the most to me. One my father-in-law had already removed, one we found that day in the drawer, and one that I looked for but could not find.


In that same drawer several weeks ago, my FIL had found a small envelope containing a piece of paper and a stick about 5" long. The paper said, in his mother's handwriting "This is a stick our little Jeff played with. May 1964". For over 40 years she had saved a piece of stick that my husband played with as a toddler. She loved him so much. My FIL put the little stick and the note in a frame as a keepsake.

Another item that stood out was a letter from her husband she had saved. Just a short note written on a plain piece of white paper. He worked as a welder in a California shipyard and often was away from home. The note was brief, "I can't wait til Friday when I can hold you in my arms again..." It contained a few other sweet sentiments, and ended with these words: "You are my good woman. Love, Bill". That is a beautiful testimony of their life together, over 60 years of marriage before he passed away.

The last item I looked for but did not find. It may have been thrown away, sold at auction, or may still be packed away somewhere. I hope to find it, because it is the one thing of hers that I really would love to have. A small wooden sign, hung with brown cord, with these words: "It's nice to be important, but it's more important to be nice." That summed up my husband's grandmother to me.

The things she left behind showed that she loved her family, her family loved her, and that being nice in this world was more valuable than being important. Those are pretty good things to leave behind.

Was Yesterday Valentine's Day?

This was originally posted on our church website blog in response to some other posts, but thought I would share it here. Even if you don't know the "who", I hope you will understand the "what and why".

Valentine's Day kind of limped past at our house, too. Jeff woke me up at 4am jokingly saying "Get up, it's morning...think about the ant!" I think he had been reading Proverbs 6 the night before. That was not exactly the way most women would start a "perfect dream holiday of love and romance" but it was our normal routine. He got up and went to work, but I have become accustomed to him not being there sometimes on Thanksgiving, Christmas Day, etc. so Valentine's is no big deal. He came in from work and ate something quickly standing up and had to go to the shop to make a part for a farmer's broken down tractor, so there was no candlelit dinner here either. There were no cards, no chocolates, and we didn't even mention that it was Valentine's until right before we went to sleep that night. All we exchanged were the words "Happy Valentine's Day", but a lot more was "exchanged" that really shows what love is. Like Tracy said, the getting up and going to work when you don't want to, but because you love someone, the getting up and fixing breakfast (when you ache all over) because you love someone, etc. Just the normal routine that says "I love you" more than a card ever could. Maybe sometime in the future when time allows we can go have a meal out or something "romantic", but life and love don't always work around a "holiday" schedule. Life went on just as usual this Valentine's Day, but it was that usual routine that showed what love really means.

We are very blessed, aren't we, not to just have the Christian husbands we have...but also to know and understand what love is about. So many people think it is about what cards or flowers or candy you give and get, but true Godly love is about giving and receiving things that can't be bought.

(P.S. Even if he had come home and said "let's go, I'm taking you out for a romantic dinner" I would have had to pass anyway! Ha Ha I hadn't washed my hair since Saturday and hadn't touched makeup since Sunday. true confession time. I didn't look OR FEEL like a Valentine yesterday!)